Another Night Post - keeping myself awake

I am so tiered...

First I couldn't go to sleep when I wanted to. Then was falling asleep when I  needed to get up and watch puppies. If I wasn't coughing some little one would make enough noise to prevent sleep...

So it's 4:00am and to my knowledge I've slept only 2 hours the entire night. sigh...

"Hear my cry, O God; attend unto my prayer. From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy. I will abide in thy tabernacle forever: I will trust in the covert of thy wings. Selah."

Psalm 61:1-4

The Night Watches

It is peaceful once more in the laundry room.

The last puppy finished her 1:00-1:40 am meal.
 

"My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness; and my mouth shall praise thee with joyful lips: When I remember thee upon my bed, and meditate on thee in the night watches. Because thou hast been my help, therefore in the shadow of thy wings will I rejoice."

Psalm 63:5-7

For those who know, those who don't know, or for those who are curious.

 

 

"The Angel of the LORD..."

 

So they say it was dead a long time... 

But with the other YFJ'ers I too believe that just before it struck
the Angel of he Lord slew it.

I also am pretty sure that Emily, standing in chest deep water, wasn't smiling like this when she,
thinking that she felt some drift wood, reached into the cloudy water and picked it up.


But anyway whether it was dead before or not I still know that:
"The angel of the LORD encampeth round about them that fear him, and delivereth them."

Psalm 34:7

A Thousand Friends

"I'm going to miss you, sister!" the five words coming from the other side of the room, spoken in heartfelt sincerity, made my stomach hurt. "Me too!" I answered.

Only a few hours later, I was in the same spot as I was last year.

I had tried to avoid thinking too much about my lonely summer, but most everybody, including myself at times, didn't help much. Every few days Emily would do the math and come up with however many days were left, until YFJ.

 

Now as I'm sitting here missing my sisters, I think again of a friends words when he saw this hanging the kitchen wall:

"No wonder you were so lonely!"


'A sister is worth a thousand friends.'

Through the Storm

This was edited from a journal post written June 28, 2013.

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I  quickly rolled over in my sleeping bag. The flash of lighting that had woken me was followed by a boom and rumble. I turned and looked at my sister raised up on her elbow. We looked at each other and although it was too dark to see her face as I raised my eyebrows  and smiled, I felt her expression was the same. "Wow."

I watched through the screen past the rain fly to the outline of tree tops. I've always liked thunderstorms, or at least as long as I can remember. It was always a cozy feeling to be safe inside but still watch. I can also remember scampering-a lot more like running several miles-to escape a thunderstorm that stuck the top of Mt. Washburn while we were there. Now this felt a little different, especially since the thunder sounded a lot closer to the flashes.

It began to pour. Sometimes the thunder was so loud you could feel the ground shake underneath you. It rained and thundered for awhile, then it all rolled away. Daddy's voice hailed us from the other tent, "You girls all OK?" "Yes" our three voices answered.

 

We all went back to sleep. The next thing I knew a extremely bright light woke me again, only a few seconds later a loud crack. I lay next to my sister all stiff, eyes wide open. Then there was an even brighter flash, and I couldn't see anything. Only two seconds later a violent crack broke out. It rumbled so loud the ground shook. This was a little much. I started wondering about the medal poles in the tent and were there roots under us, and....

 

Then a bible verse came to mind and a bible story became so vivid.

Jesus in the boat in the storm. Daddy could always animate that story so well with all the sound effects, the waves tossed us in the boat, and so on. And even though we knew what was coming he always manage to scare us at least a little.

 

But the disciples with Jesus, they were about to die. And they would have. Except that...

 But can you imagine, tossed by the incredible violence of a storm bigger than you had ever seen, and you grew up on this lake.

 

And Jesus was sleeping. Yes sleeping through it. I can't imagine how he could have if the lighting was as bright and the thunder as loud as it was last night. Except for the fact that He trusted His Father perfectly. Because He knew that nothing outside of His Father's will would happen. And He knew His Father's will was best.

 

I rolled over and rested through the rest of the storm.





There's plenty of storms in life. Most are not physical thunder and lightning storms.

But the storms in the heart can be far more fearful then any storm on earth.

And Jesus asks us to trust. When He's in the storm with us there's nothing to fear.

Like Him we can perfectly trust. Because nothing outside of our Fathers will, will happen.

And our Fathers will is best, always best for us.

Not in vain - in the Lord

It really started yesterday with a fruitless search for a crying fawn, but any way...

This morning I woke to the sound of someone kicking the front door. For whatever reason I was sure it was Emily. I slowly rolled out of bead. "Why does she have to make so much noise?" I wondered  not like she normally does, but I was still annoyed. I opened the front door and I'll never forget that sight. Draped over her arms two limp fawns. One was dead. The other almost. "I found them by that tree where I  wanted to look last night", was the explanation. The one wasn't breathing though it's heart was beating. We all set to work. Thinking there was fluid in the lungs we tried to suction them. Then compressing them. Every few minutes he would gasp for air so we were encouraged. Hot and Cold to keep the circulation going. We got some air movement but finally after a good 30 minutes, when we thought of it, we started all out CPR-ish style mouth to nose. It must have been an hour and a half since we had started that he began to twitch and move his legs, even more encouraged and often praying we continued. For a while his movement increased he began to throw his head around and it seemed he was trying to breath on his own. We often glanced at his brother lying still on the entryway floor  hoping against hope that this one would live. We watched, at this rate he should be breathing shortly. But slowly the reactions became fainter, until...
 no more twitching, no gasping for air, nothing.
At least two and a half to three hours had gone by. And I strained to feel his heart beat, nothing. We stopped everything hoping that we just had missed it. But no. Reluctantly Emily stopped breathing into him.
He had slipped away.

Helpless as we are helpless.

Weak as we are weak.

Sweat, tears, and prayers mingle together towards one goal...

life.

one little life.


God bends over this world. This dying world.-And what a new perspective I have on that word.
He poured out His sweat and tears together,

No He did more.

He poured Himself out towards one goal...


Life.


Our lives.




















Sleep still little babies.

"O death, where is thy sting?

O grave, where is thy victory?

The sting of death is sin; and the strength of sin is the law.

But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye steadfast, unmovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labor is not in vain in the Lord. "

                                                                                                                1 Corinthians 15:55-58